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Finders Keepers
'''Finder's Keepers '''is a dimension discovered by Bob Pancakes in 2011. It's use is unknown currently. Finder's Keepers is essentially a pocket in the universe that sucks in objects from other universes. Scoot Labs uses this function as a source of resources, artifacts, and discovery. Exploration Logs Log #1 Subjects: Commander Snickerbottom, a highly trained marine that currently has a kill count of 2,000. Subject was armed with a variety of weaponry from the armory, including a Fatman launcher. Findings: A gigantic wedge shaped ship with an estimated crew of 400,000. Venturing into the ship, it was discovered that the crew was completely frozen in time. Crew members wore either white plastic armor or black/grey/white tunics, boots, hats, and black gloves. Ship contained several other rounded ships with flat wings. Currently stored in Site-001's flight deck. Researchers are currently trying to unfreeze crew. Freezing may be a side effect of being sucked into the dimension. Three dead Overwatch Combine soldiers carrying submachine guns. Bodies stored in Site-001 cemetery freezer, armor stored in Alien Artifact Armory, and weapons stored in Prof. Scoot's office. A humanoid specimen with yellow skin and a strange brain-like head. According to TF2-2000, this is a byproduct of the "Highbreeds". REDACTED An abandoned space ship infested with hundreds of deformed humans that tried to attack Snickerbottom. Multiple audio logs around the ship have called these specimens "Necromorphs". Remaining specimens contained, audio logs stored in library, and technology/armor/weapons stored in respective areas, and ship was placed in Site-001's flight deck. No survivors were found A REDACTED space ship of EXPUNGED. Ship exploded before entry was possible. A giant steam powered robot, apparently a "Dwarven Centurion". TF2-003 gave Prof. Scoot a three hour long explanation on what a Dwarf was. Stored in Robotics Museum. A "Sigil Stone", TF2-003 also made a lecture on this. St̶o̶r̶e̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶A̶l̶i̶e̶n̶ ̶A̶r̶t̶i̶f̶a̶c̶t̶ ̶m̶u̶s̶e̶u̶m̶.̶ Stored in TF2-003-1 museum. An intelligent spycrab, that seems to know everything about mathematics, science, history, and the study of spaghetti. Subject speaks in a thick Scottish accent, even though he claims Scotland doesn't exist in his universe. Subject is allowed to roam the facility. Dr Scoot's notes: Well, at least we found two brand new species, right? Oh well, I'm going to get a turkey sandwich and a pepsi. Log #2 Subjects: G-1, G-2, G-3, gibus engineers forced to explore the area. Head of exploration: Dr. Bacon Strips Finding A-1: G-1: We found an abandoned spaceship or something... Dr. Strips: Enter. G-2: Alrighty then. *all three engineers enter the ship* Dr. Strips: Please vocally record your findings. *a crumbling noise is heard* G-1: Found a buncha papers, never seen the language before... Dr. Strips: Collect. G-2: *proceeds to open a door* *G-2 proceeds to curse before screaming* G-3: What the goddamn sonuvabitch?! *crunching sound is heard* *engineers use their shotguns, screaming in the process* *screaming stops* Dr. Strips: Report? G-1: Some goddamn squishy sonuvabitch don eatin Johnson! His insides dun be everywhere! Dr. Strips: Is the creature dead? G-2: Kinda, he's not movin, but he's breathin' Dr. Strips: How do you know that it's breathing? G-2: Because it's chest is goin' up and down, Jesus. Dr. Strips: Take samples of the creature and proceed. *Command promptly loses connection* *2 hours later* G-1: Hello?! Dr. Strips: G-1? G-1: We just fought a war against them ugly sticky things! Dr. Strips: Where is G-2? G-1: Dead! He got eaten by a dinosaur! Dr. Strips: what G-1: JUST GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE G-1 was the sole survivor, and was retrieved wearing solid Vivinite Skulldozer armor. G-1's conscious was uploaded to an AI so he could tell the tale for centuries. Apparently, he fought shapeshifting aliens with a sentient species of Tyrannosaurus rex that could wield shotguns. They were defending a nuclear power plant owned by the "Prince of the Otherland". G-1 came back with a shopping cart of artifacts, mostly newspaper clippings, weaponry, minerals, money, and others. All artifacts are currently stored in Site-001's library. The ship was also, apparently, an entire planet, which shows how powerful Finder's Keepers is. Log #3 Subjective: A member of the Baconi species, a sentient race of bacon strips created by throwing a slice of bacon into a vat of molten eggs. Subject is armed with a french fry. Lead Scientist: REDACTED, a 16 year old college student who works at McDonalds. Findings: Three clones of Piss Cakehole; all three were killed by Bacon in self defense. A giant room to the left of the dimension. Upon entering seems to be a empty gray room with lab equipment and server stacks. Area currently being discussed by Prof. Scoots and his friends. A huge squid-like star ship, possibly organic. Three insect-like humanoids were found floating around said starship, unconscious. Humanoids kept in freezer, ship stored in Site-001 docks. A pigeon with a space suit, is kept by Dr. Strips. A live Strider. Synth is kept in appropriate habitat. A humanoid man wearing a dirty, blue, hooded jacket, with duct tape around it's arms and legs. Duct tape may be related to rank. Subject is aggressive, and seems to carry a virus or parasite that makes victims have similar behavior. Subject's skin is grayish green, with strange bubbles all over it's skin. Subject is stored in Biohazard Storage 18#. Subject is to be fed live Gibus Engineers every day.